


School or Hell, What's the Difference?

by Evil_Panda_Roar



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Fluff, Horrors of School, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2016-12-20
Packaged: 2018-09-09 23:22:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8917150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evil_Panda_Roar/pseuds/Evil_Panda_Roar
Summary: Bill has an outburst at school, leading to a very interesting conversation with Dipper.





	

I thought humans had enough to deal with with their whole minuscule understanding of the universe, but it seems like that’s not enough for them. They have to create places called schools. Where you are judged by your ability to memorize the material and pass the tests given to you by another human with hardly any understanding of how things really work. If I didn’t feel the need to make things extra hard on Pine Tree I wouldn’t even be here. However, it was pretty great to see his face when I made him fail a test. Dumb rules about how both the cheater and the person getting cheated off of fail the test is the whole reason I was able to do that. It made no sense to me. It’s called using your resources. Never in their life will they encounter a time when they cannot ask another uneducated human about a question or they could seek some real advice and call up a demon. It’s pretty simple really.

“I hope all of you read your pages from last night.” The imbecile called a teacher stated. The bell just rang for class to begin. “You will be having a quiz over your reading from last night.

“What?” A few students complained. Some more loudly than others. Pine Tree, like always; being the fucking nerd he is, didn’t look at all worried. He probably read the pages twice and read them once more to take notes on them.

“Nerd.” I coughed a few times, hiding my insult in between the coughs. Pine Tree sat right in front of me; not by coincidence. I just had to do a little manipulating with the teacher. He could tell my insult was directed to him; I could sense that, but he didn’t respond. The teacher started passing out the quizzes. 

When the quiz was placed on my table and I started reading the first question, I started clawing the table as subtly as I could manage. The human next to me didn’t seem to notice, so I was doing a good job at it. You’ve got to be kidding me. As the teacher set the quiz down I touched her hand; giving me all of the answers to the test. It shouldn’t even be considered a quiz. All of it is wrong! Those answers aren’t correct. There are so many holes in the research; yet it is considered fact. Humans! Idiots! Morons! 

“I did not ascend from the depths of hell to deal with this shit!” I shouted and flipped the table. The table and papers from me and my table partner covered the floor. The table did a complete 180 and was lying on its surface. Not waiting for the scolding from the moron that created this quiz; which would only make things worse, and I don’t think dismembering the teacher in front of an entire class would be acceptable behavior, I rushed out of the classroom. 

~~~

The moment I heard a chair push out from behind me I knew this wasn’t going to be good. Bill hadn’t been in the best of moods lately, and this quiz wasn’t going to make things better for him. Honestly, I think he was getting stressed out. All of his attempts to ruin my life hadn’t been working out. Since my record is so clean no one could believe I did any of the things he tried to pin on me. One of them being really dumb graffiti on the front doors. Bill hid the spray cans in my locker hoping I would get in trouble. Instead the principal asked me who could have access to my locker. I told him I didn’t know because I knew Bill wouldn’t get caught. 

“I did not ascend from the depths of hell to deal with this shit!” Bill shouted, he flipped a table, which I thought was completely unnecessary. After that he ran out of the room. I debated with myself for a few seconds about following him or not. However, that debate ended quickly as I realized the damage he could do. Sure, he wasn’t looking for complete destruction of earth anymore, but if pushed to his limits he could do just that. I walked out of the room of confused people. The teacher didn’t even try to stop me. Instead she was still staring at the mess created by the demon’s outburst. 

“Bill, where are you?” I spoke normally. If Bill hadn’t completely lost it he would be able to hear me. He’s kind of been ‘connected’ to me as he put it. He always heard me, always knew where I was, and always knew what I was doing. 

“Idiots, why do I put up with these imbeciles?” I heard Bill’s rant from inside my head. 

“Where are you?” I asked again. 

“By the tree.” He finally answered before continuing his rant. It felt as though he was mad at more than just the quiz. One thing that bothered me the most about what is going on right now is that we were able to talk easily. If I wasn’t completely certain that he hated me I would have thought he liked being around me. Not that I liked being around him. Thought it did give me some comfort at times. 

I met Bill by the only tree on the school grounds. It was incredibly tall and hadn’t been bothered for years except during the holiday season. Bill sat next to it burning grass. There were already small circles of charred grass, and there would only be more if Bill stayed as upset as he is now. 

“Really? You’re letting a little quiz set you off?” Bill mutter a few words under his breath. “I don’t force you to follow me to school.”

“How else am I supposed to mess with you? Learning is the only thing you care about.” 

“That’s not true.” Though, the list of other things I cared about was small, and Bill already ruined those things for me. No more spaghetti for me after he once replaced the noodles with worms. Neither can I go on my laptop. He did something to it so whenever I open it it makes a horrible screaming noise. I tried to turn it off, but there isn’t a way to do it. Not even turning the volume off will stop it. 

“You got over all of that other small stuff really quickly. I want to make a lasting mark.” He complained. 

“Then why are you doing little things?” It was the one question I had been thinking since he showed up again. No end of days crap this time around. Only small trifles that never last long. 

“I don’t know.” He huffed, but I could tell he was lying. He refused to look at me and continued to pout. Soon the tree he was sitting under began to wilt. 

“Bill, could you not kill the only tree this school has. It’s kind of important to us, you know.” It’s been around since this place was built, and since then it has been a tradition to decorate it each winter. Some people, like my sister, went all out. 

“Would it bother you?” 

“Not really.” I didn’t care about the tree, but everyone else seemed to.

“Then I won’t.” Bill was still messing with the grass, and I realized how absurd it was that I had followed him out here. He doesn’t seem to want to do any damage, so I might as well get back to class. However, I found myself taking a seat next to him. Letting out a sigh I turned my head to look at him. 

“Bill, why are you here?” I wanted him to tell me. Why was he still bothering me? And why was it not even hurting me? Where was that dismemberment I had been expecting?

“To get revenge.” He said without any harshness. It was obvious that wasn’t it.

“No, if it was for revenge I would be dead by now.”

“How do you know? Sometimes living is more painful than death.”

“Wow, I didn’t expect you to get dark all of a sudden.” I added humorously. He smiled softly at that. “Now tell me the real reason you’re here.” 

“It felt weird without you. I never missed a human before, but I started feeling sad that I couldn’t see you again. I went and asked some friends why that was and they all told me the same thing.” He… missed me? 

“What did they say?” I said breathlessly. For whatever reason breathing was hard for me right now. Maybe it had something to do with Bill. 

“They said…” He trailed off, obviously thinking hard about what to say. “There’s an ice cream truck nearby.” He jumped up, happy for the distraction.

“Bill!” I called after him as he started running away. Just as he said, a few seconds later, I heard the jingle of an ice cream truck. This was going to take some time to get him to tell me what his friends said; isn’t it? I longingly looked back at the school. Looks like I’m not going to make it back. Not when I want to know what it is he wanted to say. 

“Can I have one of everything you’ve got?” Bill said as he leaned against the truck. It was obvious to me that he was in the poor guys head; manipulating him. 

“Bill.” I complained and slapped him on the arm. 

“Oh, Pine Tree, what do you want?” 

“Nothing, when it’s stolen.” 

“It’s not stolen! He’s giving it to us for free!”

“Because you did that whole mind thing on him.” Bill waved me off and took his armful of ice cream treats. He doesn’t even need to eat!

“Are you sure you don’t want one?” Bill asked again. Holding out a ice cream sandwich. Reluctantly, I took it. It’s not like it’s that bad that I’m eating this? Right?

“Fine, but mention this to no one.” I joked. 

“It’ll be our secret.” Bill answered with metaphorically zipping his mouth shut while juggling the ice cream in one arm. It was a lot better than literally; which he has done before. He then proceeded to unwrap an ice cream treat and drop it under a tree we were passing by. I was about to complain about his wasteful ways when a small group of chipmunks ran out to start devouring it. I watch in wonder as they didn’t fear either of us. We were close enough we could pounce on them, but the only thing they worried about was if they got a fair share of ice cream. 

“Do you do this often?” I finally asked after the little furballs ran off.

“Yeah, I hate humans, not all animals.” He said and started walking back to the school again. At a few other places he dropped off more ice cream and animals would clammer after it. I was completely lost by affection when a fat raccoon, one that was very clean I shall add, started eating an ice cream bar. It was so cute, and Bill was rubbing it behind the ears, causing it to make a purring like noise. At first I thought it was a growl, but the racoon seemed to be happy. 

“How do you do that?” I was curious, but then I realized it probably had something to do with his demon powers. That’s when I started to give him a suspicious look. Which he responded to with a smirk. So that is how he did that. “I should have known.” It was upsetting that I hadn’t thought of that before. 

“So, Pine Tree, about what I was going to say before.” I had to search my mind for a few moments before I remembered what he was talking about. The cute animals had kind of gotten me side tracked. It was embarrassing, that is Mabel’s job. 

“What about it?” 

“My friends said there was only one thing it could be. Something uncommon for a demon to feel, but not impossible.” My face started warming up as I was expecting his confession. Bill paused; noticing my anticipation and dragging it out to pain me. “I have a strong emotion towards you, Pine Tree. And there is only one word for it.” He took a step closer to me. I surprised myself by not taking one back. 

“What word is it?” I asked; hoping he would tell me already. Even though I had a pretty good idea of what he was going to say. I needed to hear him say it.

“It’s the most disgusting emotion you humans have.” He said that as though he didn’t actually feel emotions. “Love.” I nearly jumped when he said the word. Instead I pressed my lips against his in a quick kiss. My excitement making it impossible not to. Bill gave me a weird look that I could only describe as bewilderment. “Does that mean you’re mine now?” 

“Yes, with limitations.”

“What limitations are they?” Bill smirked at me. Probably planning to push me to my limits in every way.


End file.
